Dear Embrie - 22 months

Dear Embrie Jean,

It has been a while since I have had the chance to write.  Do not think that reflects on the love that I have in my heart for you, because my love has only grown, as it will each day we have together.  Instead, I had a bit of a realization - it is simple really. The best thing I can give you is not just to capture our lives together in any fashion whether it be on this blog, a scrapbook, baby book or photo album; rather, it is my time.  My time in which you are the focus, you are the treasure.  My time where I enjoy the here and now and nothing else.  This is something that a mother knows, but is much harder practiced.  But for awhile I needed to wade into spending time in the present and not just checking of items on my perpetual to-do list. So your letters will come when they come, I do hope to keep writing them because I love reflecting on what you and your brother bring into my life, but I will only do so when they are not going to take away from what I have to give you.  So on with it...

Over the past few months you have started communicating.  It has been a rough go.  There was quite a spell that you knew what you wanted to say, but we just weren't getting it.  There were tears, there were tantrums, there was foot stomping, there was more crying.  But baby girl, you are not a baby girl anymore. Though I only understand about 70% of what you say, you are talking to us in full sentences. You are conveying your wants and needs and likes and dislikes.  But throughout the past few months you have certainly had three favorite words.  Three words we heard A LOT: "No!" "Poop," and "Mama."  I am thankful that I am in the top three, but really, you could have associated me with a few better terms.  Poop. You say poop a lot.  Part of this is because you call everything gross - poop.  This means poop is poop, along with dirt and well, anything brown.  The sad part is that though we often correct you all your poop talk generally cracks me, your dad, and your brother up - and you like a laugh, so I am sure the poop talk will continue.

You adore your brother.  You love to do what he is doing and not just in the "I can do it myself" sort of way (which there is plenty of), but really truly in a manner that you love spending time with him. We still face the challenge that this means that you want whatever he has and no substitute is good enough, but the lessons of sharing and taking turns continues.  Regardless, you light up when you are the focus of Hyat's attention.  And he can make you laugh.  Often you will laugh when he is doing all sorts of ornery things - like tackling you and smothering you will pillows.  I would tell him to stop and calm down or be gentle, but it hard for that to make sense when you are laughing and giggling and well, having a ball.  So we let you be and know that there is a 50/50 chance that one of you will end up in tears.  As long as there are no serious injuries, I think the joy is worth it.

People often say little girls have a way of wrapping their daddies around their finger. I am not sure I believed it, and I doubt your dad would ever admit it, but it is true.  In your own special way, you have him wrapped around your finger. You can make him light up in a special way when you giggle with him or cuddle with him.  In a way that only a baby girl can.  It has truly made me appreciate that we each have our roles in your life and your brother's life. A mom and a dad both serve in a special place for their children and that it will come naturally if we just step back and let our love shine through and parent you in the way we were each made to. I know there are many years ahead of us and I cannot imagine your love for your dad growing stronger, but I am thankful to simply know that as you spend time with him and learn from him it will.

People are fascinated by you. It is hard to explain, but so easily understood. You are pensive, yet enthusiastic.  You are shy, yet wild.  You sweet and ornery.  You certainly like to take everything in and will form your own opinions about people and things.  You do not let anyone "in" just because - they have to earn it.  But when they do they see sheer joy and delight in you.  I love this in you.  Because you are own little independent soul.  You generally think before you act, but when you act it is with joy and reckless abandon.  This also means you can go from one extreme to the other in a matter of seconds - from angry to laughing, happy to sad, sweet to stubborn.  I am not this is the joys of having a girl or this is just who you are, unrestrained.

Embrie

So 22 month has come and gone, and you will soon be 2.  I loved you yesterday, I love you today and I will love you tomorrow.

Much Love,
Your Mama